The “You Are Lucky To Have a Job” Syndrome
Is it really a blessing, or is it a curse?
Photo by Luis Villasmil on Unsplash“You are so lucky to have a job” is the buzz statement that’s been made even more significant as a result of the immense job loss from the COVID-19 Pandemic. Considering all that’s gone on in 2020, I would be more inclined to say, “ You should be grateful to be alive.” I mean, the fact that you can read this today is a blessing in itself.
As a culture in America, we need to stop placing the heaviest importance on constant work and should instead start bringing inner wellbeing to the forefront, now more than ever before. We make statements like “You should be lucky you still have a job” because we have built our lives, making work and money the focal of our entire existence. It’s become so embedded into our programming that the events of 2020 may have been the silver lining we all needed to start looking in other departments of our lives.
What we should be saying to one another is, “how brave that you have the inner strength and awareness for recognizing what is not aligning with your core values (what you believe in, your non-negotiables) and taking action.”
A Gallup report from 2014 estimated that the average full-time worker in the United States works 47 hours a week, one of the highest figures in the world, and significantly higher than the rates in Western Europe.
Do we not owe ourselves the opportunity to honor your soul?
Many of us who have jobs may not exactly love them and find ourselves believing and being reminded by our employer and colleagues that we are lucky to have a job still! If your job gives you emotional stress, anxiety, restless nights, leaves you feeling uneasy regularly, you may want to look into this further. If the only times you are excited are when it’s Friday afternoon 2 minutes before exiting the building or when the direct deposit hits your account, it may be time to start thinking of your exit strategy.
An unhappy or unhealthy work environment is terrible for a business’ bottom line and bad for employees.
Studies have shown being unhappy with or unfulfilled by work can take a toll on our health, relationships, and even lifespan. Those in unhealthy work environments tend to gain more weight, have more healthcare appointments, and have higher rates of absenteeism. Stress from work can also impact their family life, mental health and even increase risks for chronic illnesses and heart attacks.
If you are doing a job that you are less than thrilled about, you may be just wasting your time and hurting yourself in the process, especially if it’s taking an emotional and physical toll on your wellbeing. If you are spending your time doing something that you don’t want to be doing, all because you’re lucky to have a job that pays your bills, you also accept the cost. And by that, I mean the price you pay in exchange, feeling burnt out, non-engaged, moody at work and during off-hours, as well as possible fatigue and depression. Only you can decide if all of this is genuinely worth it for you, but for me, it’s a definite NO.
Been There Before:
Without knowing you and your specific situation, I have been there. I was once a person behind a desk, doing a job I was less than unenthused about. It wasn’t so much the job itself that was so bad; it was more the work culture and people. By that I mean, the mindsets, the soullessness, the robotic programming, the office politics, and the game that you need to play to stay in the good graces of the upper management “leaders.” When you spend a minimum of 40 hours at a job per week under these circumstances, you may start feeling like each day is slowly chipping away at your soul. You eventually get to the point where you have to ask, “Why do I continue to torture myself?”
The only answer for me was the paycheck, benefits, and comfort = THE GOLDEN HANDCUFFS.
I didn’t stay because I loved my job or felt inspired, motivated, appreciated. I did not have someone above me who cared about my well-being and my future and wanted to see me develop my skills to grow further. Nope, I stayed purely for the money and benefits. I have found that many toxic work cultures operate with an underlying policy of “how much are you willing to give up from your life” to be considered a successful asset to our company. The more you give up your personal life, the more they take and continue to demand of you, all to turn around and say, “well, you should be grateful; you still have a job.”
We have it all wrong; we stay for all the wrong reasons. The question becomes when does it become enough?
When it gets to the point that you are choking your lunch down over your keyboard daily and haven’t stepped foot outside to see the light of day, you know you have a problem.
When you have accumulated many days off from not taking a vacation, you fear taking a vacation. The mere thought of the workload that awaits you upon your return is enough to keep you imprisoned and chained to that seat.
You cringe over the thought of coming face to face with your boss that you do everything in your power to avoid them on a regular. “Houston, we have a problem!”
I’ve witnessed some things and have even had my fair share of experiences with less than sub-par working environments. Have you ever had a piece of paper scrunched up into a ball and flung at your head? I sure hope not, well, I have, and this was all because my supervisor had to repeat something a second time. She was wrong for displaying this level of unprofessionalism. The fact that I continued to stay in that job for another eight months, all for the sake of a paycheck, was astonishing to me, now that I think back on it.
It’s mindblowing the way we convince ourselves that we have to stay in that hell and continue to accept it and make it into a norm. Many others have endured their share of battles, and I’m sure there will be many more, but the fact that we as human beings accept this behavior and allow others the power to do so is not okay.
Do Your Research:
Maybe the question we should all be asking instead of saying, “You should be lucky to have a job,” is why you aren’t looking into a better work environment, where the company’s core values align with yours, a place that regards its employees. Go in seek of companies that have a reputation for building up their employees rather than telling them, “you are lucky you still have a job,” and using it as rhetoric to hold over their heads.
Reach out to some current employees via LinkedIn to ask what the culture is like if need be.
Go on Glassdoor and other job site search engines to read through current employees and former employees’ reviews.
Contact headhunters and ask them some questions about the companies that are of interest to you.
Google the company and see what information comes up.
Reclaim Your Power and Create Your Own Opportunity:
It’s almost as if we feel we cannot find something better, that we must continue to endure this treatment. It may not be easy to find that perfect place as all companies have their own set of “things,” but you can certainly always take back your power and create your opportunity for yourself. We are living in 2021, after all, a time when you can set up your own business in a day or less, you can do so many things online, you can sell pretty much anything, you can learn anything for free compliments a la Google and Youtube, you can teach anything, you can be your own boss, you can create your own hours if you want. Heck, you can even work from anywhere in the world while you do it. I’m doing this as we speak from the beautiful island of Bali, Indonesia.
My point is you have options; you have so many possibilities, so the fact that you would continue to stay in a very limiting, depleting, unfulfilling situation this day in age is a bit of your own fault. You have the option to do something that is fulling and gratifying. So I ask this question again, Why are you so lucky to have that job you don’t believe in? You are merely trading your soul for money.
A Job is Like A Marriage:
A job is a lot like a marriage, you spend most of your time working at it, so if you are not doing something you love and enjoy doing, it’s just for show while feeling empty inside. On the other hand, it can be a lot like being in a loving relationship; you will thrive if you love something you do; it will get you through anything because you are willing to do whatever it takes to see it through. The money will often follow when you’re into it because it comes from the heart.
When It Costs You More Than Money:
I was once that person I was once waiting for that paycheck to slide into my bank account. And you know what, yeah, it was a great feeling. Still, I’ll tell you what; a more incredible feeling is using the time I have now intentionally. I am no longer working in a corporate environment and have decided to go all-in on myself, creating my own opportunity. I select the things that I want in my life based on my core values. I’ve realized that money is essential, but money is not everything, and for me, it wasn’t worth selling my soul. Money shouldn’t keep you in places that you are no longer benefiting from in your life and cost you your peace. If it costs you your peace, it is too expensive.
The Takeaway:
Please don’t sell your soul; strengthen it! You are stronger than you think, and you were made to do more than you are doing if you feel like something is OFF. You owe yourself a CHANCE TO TRY, at the very least! Please do not take the easy, more comfortable path and stay in something you have outgrown. That “feeling” you are feeling is your sign that it’s time to move along on your journey. You have options, you have choices, and you do not require anyone’s permission to make them for your life.
So next time someone tells you, “You are lucky to have a job,” tell them that your life is a gift and that you will honor yourself and create a path that satisfies your soul and makes you happy!
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